The Weiner's Circle

Joey, a newly arrived rookie on our squad answered a call regarding a "dog in the roadway" early one morning. The neighborhood he was called to is an upscale area, and as it was a weekend, the city's animal control officers were not working.

Upon arrival, Joey saw a little fat bellied dachshund just standing in the middle of the roadway, looking very proud and stout. He stared straight ahead and watched Joey out of the corner of his eye. As he was an animal lover, Joey squatted down and used all kinds of goofy voices to coax the dog over to him. The dog hesitantly responded and allowed Joey to pet him as he called for another officer to respond with the animal control truck. Joey felt confident that he was fulfilling his community oriented policing duties as well as providing for the animal's safety. The dog was very calm for several minutes as Joey talked to him and petted him. Minutes later, another officer arrived on the calm and serene setting with the animal control truck.

Joey calmly picked the dachshund up to about waist level to place him in the dog crate. As their eyes met, the fat weiner dog turned into a biting, scratching, snarling, slobber spitting devil dog!! As it attempted to rip apart Joey's flesh, he dropped it to the ground. Instincts kicking in, he grabbed for the butt of his service pistol. Thinking twice about his decision, and looking around the neighborhood, he put away his pistol and then gave chase to the dog.

Joey could be heard yelling and screaming for the dog to stop, but to no avail. He chased it over fences, around fences, behind bushes and through bushes. It would run away about 50 yards, then wait for Joey to catch up as if teasing him. While waiting for Joey, the dog would watch him out of the corner of his eye, then when he got close, the fleet-footed wiener dog would take off again.

As they took off into the street, Joey got into the passenger side of the animal control truck as the other officer drove. Joey hung out the passenger window and tried to snare the dog with the dogcatcher's snag pole. However, it avoided the pole and started running towards the truck tires forcing the vehicle to swerve away so as not to hit it. After several more minutes of this, the dachshund had enough of the nonsense and was last seen disappearing behind some houses. Being true to a cop's comical side, we could not resist making a wanted poster for the wiener dog offering a reward for his capture and hanging it in the squad room. Joey will also enjoy his new Native American name "Dances with Dachshunds."

 
Michael A. Amann
Police Officer
Lexington Police Dept.
Lexington, NC
pictured: Michael Amann (l), Joey, the dog chaser